*pix Marilyn Monroe

Sex, Understanding, Confusion, False Messages and Eating Disorders

If you have an eating disorder, you most likely know that human sexuality is flagrantly advertised and photographed, exploited and both demonized and idealized in our culture.  Yet  your actual experience is rarely reflected back to you in ways that help you feel understood or understand yourself. Worse, the bomardment of sexual behavior and sexual etiquette definitions may overwhelm you before you can develop your own appreciation for what's important to you.

Here's an example of the pressure on you to fit into a predetermined and callous sexually desireable straightjacket.

The Days after Thanksgiving – Time for Your Real Thankfulness

In my years as a psychotherapist, I’ve been honored to work with many people who reveal and discover their true feelings during holidays. As we share and explore together, we find the core gratitude within that enhances daily life and enriches their holiday experience. Perhaps some of what we’ve found will deepen and enrich your experience too.

The Thanksgiving holiday is over. You may reflect on:

Every holiday seems to have a large food component in our culture. Fourth of July is no exception. If you have an eating disorder, the holiday may pose some challenges for you that other people don't consider.

If you recognize these challenges and confront them directly in terms of your needs and vulnerabilities, you can participate in a fun celebration while maintaining your eating disorder recovery. Fourth of July food challenges take many forms.

“Trust that which gives you meaning and accept it as your guide.” Carl Jung

Trusting Dreams as Living Truth-Tellers

How Dreams Can Guide Emotional Recovery

By Joanna Poppink, MFT

When you're anxious, depressed, or trapped in an unfulfilling relationship, you may not know whom to trust or what to believe. Yet inside you is a source of guidance that never lies—your dreams.

Dreams communicate through symbols shaped by the unconscious mind. These masks protect you from facing the full truth too soon. Beneath them lies meaning that can lead you toward dreams and recovery, strength, and fulfillment.

Summary

Dreams act as living messengers from the unconscious, guiding us toward truth when our conscious life has lost direction. Joanna Poppink recounts a vivid dream that marked the turning point in her recovery and her emergence into an authentic, meaningful life. Through an analysis of its symbols—sea, wave, stillness, and motion—she demonstrates how dreams and recovery are inextricably linked. Dreams can reveal the Self's buried power and lead to transformation.

The essay invites readers to see their own dreams as allies in healing from depression, anxiety, eating disorders, or emotional disconnection. Listening to dreams means facing fear, dismantling defenses, and discovering wisdom already within.

The Dream That Began My Healing

Decades ago, one dream changed my life.

I was adrift in a small sailboat with my husband and his friend. The sea was still, the sky clear. Suddenly, a massive wave appeared on the horizon. It grew until it filled the sky. We raised the sails and tried to flee, but it was endless.

As it towered over us, I knew the crash would engulf us. We wouldn't survive. I was helpless before this overwhelming power. The wave crashed—and I woke, heart pounding, gasping in terror.

I wrote down the dream, not yet knowing it was a message from my unconscious calling me to wake up. That nightmare led me to leave a destructive marriage, pursue higher education, recover from bulimia, and build a life of meaning and integrity.

Understanding the Symbols

In that dream, I was "at sea," drifting through life without direction. The calm water mirrored my paralysis. The coming wave symbolized the point when denial no longer holds. Reality came headlong for me.

The wave was not an external disaster; it was my own life force demanding to be recognized. My authentic Self was ready to destroy what no longer served me. When the wave struck, the false life came to an end. The real one began; dreams and recovery unfolded together.

The Work of Transformation

The change did not come all at once. It took years to rebuild my life in alignment with my truth. Looking back, I see that the tsunami was not a punishment but a revelation.

The same powerful energy that once felt destructive became the source of my renewal. The wave that "killed" my old life carried me to the shore of my true one. Such is the paradox of dreams and recovery—the very force that terrifies you may be your greatest ally.

A Life Reclaimed

Tonight, I write from my quiet studio. My dogs sleep nearby. My bills are paid. My home is my own. I am free from bulimia. My psychotherapy practice brings meaning and connection.

Soon I'll attend a Jungian workshop on It's a Wonderful Life. In January, I'll lead a dream workshop of my own.

I love the life that grew from that single dream. It took a tsunami to break my resistance—and teach me to honor what is meaningful.

Listening to Your Dreams

What do your dreams tell you?

If you struggle with anxiety, self-doubt, or an eating disorder, your dreams may hold the truth your conscious mind avoids. You might cling to symptoms that ease your pain but block awareness. Yet your suffering itself carries meaning. It pushes you to seek help, to find what's missing.

That's why you're reading this now. Your unconscious is calling. Listen—it may lead you toward dreams and recovery.

Facing the Fear of Knowing

It's not self-knowledge that hurts—it's the fear of losing your defenses. You may believe you are your pain, that you're broken or unworthy.

But your dreams expose that illusion. They remove the blindfold, letting you see what's been within you all along—your strength, longing, and capacity to live differently. Dreams and recovery open the same door to inner freedom.

The Way Back to Your Soul

There is no formula for healing. There is only your way—the one that honors your truth and brings meaning to your life.

Dreams are the language of your inner wisdom. Learning to listen to them can guide you home to yourself.

Invitation

If you wish to begin this journey, start a dream journal. Each morning, before speaking to anyone, record fragments, feelings, or images that come to mind. Over time, patterns will appear—and with them, the voice of your authentic Self. This simple act can be the beginning of uncovering hidden meanings in your psyche and dreams, ultimately leading to personal growth and recovery.

FAQ

1. Why do dreams use symbols instead of direct messages?

Because the unconscious speaks in metaphor. Symbols protect the dreamer from the overwhelming truth while allowing gradual understanding.

2. How can I tell if a dream is important?

Dreams that evoke strong emotion—fear, awe, relief, or love—often carry deep personal meaning. Write them down immediately.

3. What if I can't remember my dreams?

Keep a notebook by your bed. Upon waking, record any fragment—a color, phrase, or feeling. The more attention you give dreams, the more they reveal themselves.

4. Can dreams help with eating disorder recovery?

Yes. Dreams reveal the emotional and spiritual hunger beneath the behavior. Understanding those symbols can open the path to genuine nourishment and freedom.

5. How can I interpret my dreams without misreading them?

Begin by describing images and emotions rather than assigning meaning too soon. Over time, patterns emerge. Working with a depth-oriented therapist can help translate dream language into insight.

6. Are nightmares harmful?

No. Nightmares are urgent messages from the psyche. They often appear when something vital needs your attention. 

Resources

 

Books

• C.G. Jung – Man and His Symbols
• Marie-Louise von Franz – Dreams
• Marion Woodman – The Pregnant Virgin
• James Hillman – The Dream and the Underworld
• Robert A. Johnson – Inner Work

Online Resources

• International Association for the Study of Dreams
• Joanna Poppink, MFT – Eating Disorder Recovery and Depth Psychotherapy

Joanna is a private practice psychotherapist. She is licensed in CA, AZ, OR and FL. Author of the Book: Healing Your Hungry Heart: Recovering from Your Eating Disorder. Appointments are virtual.

For a free telephone consultation, e-mail her at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

Dreams play a crucial role in eating disorder recovery, offering valuable insights and opportunities for healing. Understanding the connection between them and eating disorders can aid individuals on their journey to wellness.

Five Ways Dreams Relate to Eating Disorder Recovery

1. Emotional Processing:

Dreams serve as a platform for processing complex emotions associated with eating disorders, such as anxiety, guilt, and shame. Exploring this content helps individuals work through these emotions in a safe and symbolic way, facilitating emotional healing.

Eating disorder recovery requires deep work. Suppose this treasure was your dream image. How would you understand it? Would you go surface or deep?

Dreams go deep. With understanding, you can benefit from your dream images. If you attend to your dream images and wonder about them, you have an opportunity to go more deeply into the meaning this image holds for you. This is more than an intellectual exercise.

Feelings are lost or unknown, forgotten memories and physical sensations echoing your past come into consciousness. What your eating disorder represses has an opportunity to ascend to awareness. That's when you have a genuine healing opportunity.

Your dream images can help your awareness explode like a blooming fire and lead you into recovery with newly released energy.

Dream Journal Value

Keeping a written record of your dreams is often part of eating disorder recovery work. Clients do it dutifully, resentfully, awkwardly, and enthusiastically. They forget to do it.

They can't do it because they can't remember their dreams. They are embarrassed to do it because the dreams are embarrassing. Or they refuse to do it because the dreams are frightening. Yet, any of these experiences add value to the recovery process.

This is the story of how one mother, with Jesus imagery in her dream, reconnected to her authentic self during a time of conflict with her adult daughter.

Q: Why are inner explorations and investigations of dream images called work?

A: Because we are construction workers. We build bridges. We gather raw materials from our psyches, discover their relevance and shape them to form bridges between our unconscious and conscious.

We create a means of transporting what is deep within us to our day-to-day perceptions. We learn to tolerate emotional disruption as we adjust to greater meaning and understanding in our lives and the world.