Tracy, Sounds like you are in touch w
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Tracy,
Sounds like you are in touch with the young and frightened part of yourself who needs care, understanding and protection. You can move from one part of your psyche to another and experience each part emotionally as if that were all there is.
You are writing down what the frightened part of you has to say. Now respond to her.
"You can't do anything right." response: I'm here and an adult. I've been doing many things right every day or I wouldn't have come this far in my life. You are scared. You think you are right in what you see and feel. But you are little and frightened. I can do enough right to take care of you and not let you hurt yourself.
"I don't want to be hurt ever again." response: no one wants to be hurt. Pain is part of living. But I will do my best to make sure you are protected.
"I told you that you would cave." response: You think that my caving will protect you by keeping the eating disorder going. And you think that if I cave that means I can't take care of myself and that means I'm not reliable enough to take care of you. Please know I will have weak moments. I'll be tempted. And sometimes I'll listen to you so thoroughly that I can't hear my own thoughts. But I will show up for me, and I will show up for you.
You think I'm wrong if I disagree with you. You think I'm wrong if I don't do something to stop your feelings. But I'm doing something right so you can find out you can feel what you feel and discover that nothing bad is happening. I'm doing something right so we can find ways to communicate with each other. I'm doing something right because I know how frightened you are, and letting you show me how frightened you are, and still be here for you and me too.
How's that for a start, Tracy?
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