I dont know if I'll ever be totally Recovered or not, but I do know that just as some people should never drink, I should never diet. I have to keep remembering that. I have to trust that if I really work on my recovery, ED urges or no ED urges, I will be able to handle what life brings me. I have my once a year big handbell concert tonight and last night I found out that the one firend whom I thought would come, isn't. Every year my firends make up excuses and every year I don't admit how bad it hurts and just feel bitter when they ask me to do something later. But last night I started crying and allow the feelings of disappointment and loneliness to happen, and the really great thing....I didn't notice until this morning that I didn't even consider using ED behaviors to deal with the feelings. The only coping questions were if I share my dissappointment with my friend or not...and I think that's normal stuff for anyone!