Dear PTC, I'm glad to be hearing from you again. Thank you for posting. Here's the basics of my response to you. Please bear with me. Your response and my answer may relate to many people in your situation. The unalterable fact is that you are a human being. I remember a client from many years ago who had a full on screaming tantrum in my office shouting, "I don't want to be human!" We don't get to change species. We are human and so are you. Human beings have feelings. We have an emotional life. Our emotions are useful. They connect us to other people so we can propagate and create needed community. Feelings show us, through fear, that we need to take care of ourselves. Feelings provide us with so much more. Anorexia is about withdrawing from the human condition. Think of how much is denied when anorexia prevails. You restrict food and companionship and sexuality and the exploration of what you truly care about. Your presence in the world gets smaller and smaller - not just your body. The goal of so many women with anorexia is to become so light they are pure spirit. That means safety and freedom to them, but in actuality it means death. Human beings, like it or not, are made of flesh and blood. We, and you, need nourishment of all kinds. You are emotionally connected to your cat. :) (I'm emotionally connected to mine too -- Jack and Bodhi - two brothers, 3/4 Siamese, 11 years old.) This emotional connection enriches your life. You know it does. Can you find a way to begin to enrich your emotional life? Can you experiment with what brings you closer to your authentic feelings? Karen's book might help you. So many ways exist to touch your emotional life. Poetry and stories can be a safe way to begin. Please let me know how you progress. And, how is your cat? :) J