I've come back to this post a number of times and am still trying to process all of it. My first reaction was to think I am bad or weak for wanting comfort. I think my therapist started with comfort as a way to model for me how to self soothe as I kept getting overwhelmed and flooded. Now there is a lot more holding but still some comfort too. I still wish for comfort as much as I understand that holding is what will help me grow. I feel some shame about wanting comfort. I can tell when my T is trying to hold at times that I am really wanting comfort. Sometimes I have to dig deep and do a lot o self soothing to not to beg for comfort. Whew...thinking about all of this does bring up a lot of confusion and shame. Growing pains. I'll have to keep re-reading and thinking and see where I go with all of this.