I'm intrigued with these 300 maxims; alt

I'm intrigued with these 300 maxims; although I will admit that at times, I'm struggling to follow. Seems every time I re-read your blogs, I'm reading something different :) maybe that's a good thing! So I haven't relapsed on paper.....actually the 16th marked my 100th day of not restricting. But I'm feeling like a “dry drunk.” I'm emotionally withdrawing again and I'm finding myself stuck in my “internal dark places” again, where my ED likes to take control. The desire to lose weight is getting strong again and I seem to be avoiding “life” by focusing on my struggles in recovering......then I tell myself that I might as well do the ED activities...at least I'd be a smaller size. I know I'm avoiding looking at parts of myself and my life. I know I've learned things about myself these last 100 days, but I seem to be stuck now. Not sure if I'm scared of what's next or if I've fallen for “numbing” again. I will continue to follow your posts and hopefully something will relate to me! I may not feel really good about myself right now, but I know recovery is the most important thing to me.....or I would have given into my desires long ago! Thanks for sharing with us!! I still get excited when you have a new post! Kym