I probably don't use my movies and books

I probably don't use my movies and books in a positive way. I just love watching/reading that stuff. In the past I used these things to keep me from eating and to give me motivation to be better at starving myself. I don't do that so much anymore, I think I just watch them because I enjoy them and can related to the characters. Many times though, I feel like the people in these books and movies are so much worse than I am so it makes me feel like I don't have an ED, or that mine's really not that bad. I go in phases of watching them a lot and then not watching. I'll youtube a lot of ED stuff too. I read books when I can get my hands on them.