I know there is so much more to take from this blog, but let me share with you what hit me first. I have been on this sugar craze for weeks...night eating is my hardest time for this. I was sitting here going thru my emails, connecting with friends on facebook, and searching the internet for ways to stop wanting to eat sugar...then I came here to check in for the night. After reading your blog, somehow my craving diminished...I am looking through to see what about it hit me in that manner, to lessen a craving that I was just about ready to get up and "satisfy". I think it took a while to read :), so perhaps the craving just passed. Seriously, however, I really feel your connection to what you do...your passion is genuine,as is your committment to those of us you have never met and may never meet. (although I would love to meet you some day!) Most of us here, or maybe I should just speak for myself, have very deep trust issues. I have a great therapist and I imagine that your clients must know what a special gift they have in you. I think I found it spiritually nourishing to read how you care for your clients, and for Winston. I recently took in a kitten that had been a stray and taken in by a friend for several months. When my friend found her (and her 2 siblings), my kitty had a fish hook caught in the corner of her mouth. She was very scared, in pain, and very hard to catch. She still has an opening in the side of her mouth where the hook pulled. When she came to stay with me, she wouldn't eat. I had to feed her by hand and force fluids. Finally, I had to decide to place her in a small, comfortable, non-threatening room with food and water and just let her be. I had to trust that she would take it upon herself to listen to her body's needs to accept the nourishment that was offered. I used this time to gently talk with her and use a soothing tone as I entered the room to gather a belonging or put something away. Slowly, she has begun to trust me. Only me. She runs from my children, and gets very shaky when I am holding her and they are near. But when it is just the two of us, she is letting down her guard, coming to find my hand, to stroke, cuddle and comfort. I love watching her flip over on her back "asking" me to rub her tummy. I find this time of night just as calming for me. There are parallels to her trust levels and mine. I too, have a very small radius of genuine trust. Right now, I too, am taking baby steps toward a more fulfilling and complete life. I too, am nourishing my body by choosing to eat what is before me. I too, still like to retreat into my own ED world, coming out when I garner courage, sometimes running back when I feel unsafe. But gradually, the courage is trumping the fear. I think we are doing a lot of good for each other. Great blog! Tracy