Dear Diane, I congratulate you on your insight. Yet, as you say, old patterns and compensatory eating behaviors can remain deeply entrenched regardless of insight. This, I believe, is where we need to develop and honor our spiritual strength, whatever that means to us.
Reading and studying various kinds of spiritual teachings is lovely and can be profound. But it still doesn't get us there. We need to live the teachings we believe. We need to make them not only our own but make them such an integrated part of us we don't even notice that we live them out. Then we have a foundation that goes far deeper than "compensatory eating behaviors" to care for ourselves.
This is not easy to accomplish. It's subtle. But it begins with simple steps. For example, in my studies of Buddhism I learned to add to any prayer or wish or desire or goal setting "for the benefit of all."
Over time this affected how I set goals and my attitude toward what I wanted in life. It brought me a greater connection to other people and a greater liking for myself. And that can undermine those old patterns.
We often don't need to say "no" to our negative patterns. We need to say "yes" to something better.
So yes, yes, yes, keep your attention on what really matters to you no matter how that affects your weight.
Eventually you will come into balance with yourself. warm regards, Joanna
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