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If you suffer from an eating disorder now or have in the past, please email Joanna for a free telephone consultation.


Eating Disorder Recovery
Joanna Poppink, MFT
Eating Disorder Recovery Psychotherapist
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Paul_Salvator_Goldengruen3B_Der_Maler-FC3BCrst Self-esteem is the bedrock from which you see the world, feel your responses, make decisions and take action. Here are 13 more tips to building your self-esteem.


Eating disorders often fill in the psychological gaps that occur because of low self-esteem. Fill those gaps with a sense of genuine self-value and you weaken the strength and need for your eating disorder.


If your self-esteem is low you may grovel, go into people pleasing mode or isolate.  You may get bossy or arumentative with a strong need to control to compensate for your poor estimation of yourself.

If your self-esteem is positive and solid you meet others with confidence. You voice your position based on your authentic values and your judgment about the appropriateness of the occasion.  You listen to others, confident that you can hear what they say without losing your own thoughts yet are willing to consider a different perspective. Positive self-esteem gives you resiliency in your relationships.

13 Steps to Building Your Self-Esteem

1.    Arrange to hear your favorite song or type of music at least once a day.


2.    Praise yourself for troublesome actions you didn't take.


3.    Notice acts of kindness on the part of others. Give them a nod or a thumbs up or a smile.


4.     Provide nourishment for your talents or wished for talents. Give yourself time to sketch, paint, write, dance, sing. Take a class for the fun of it.


5.     Do something nice for your neighbor. Give a compliment in person.  Drop off an appreciation card. If you have an abundance of something, give them a gift of the extra. I

sometimes find a bag of lemons or mandarin oranges at my front door from my neighbors with these vigorous trees. It's a lovely way to share and build not only self-esteem but also warm relationships.


6.     Visit your childhood home. Look at your neighborhood with the adult eyes you have now.  If your first home is far away, see if you can find it on google maps.  You might  

get lucky.   I did and even found a little passageway between two houses where my friends and I played scientist with rocks and mica on stone steps.


7.     Practice accepting compliments.  When someone admires something you have, do, wear or something about you, smile and say, "Thank you."  That's all.


8.     Let someone, including a child, teach you something.


9.     Create a special candlelight dinner for a friend, adult or child, to honor them. It doesn't have to be a big occasion.  Maybe it's a special dinner with candles and pretty  

napkins because you are glad that person is in your life and you want the to know how happy you are about that.


10.    Keep a journal or calendar where you plan ahead.  Include written reminders so you know what's coming and you can be prepared and ready.


11.    Make your mornings as calm and simple as possible.  Start your day with serenity.  This is a major challenge in our culture.  You can reduce morning chaos by planning          ahead.  What could work for you?  Lay out clothes the night before. Have work materials stored neatly in a "work storage" place so you can just pick it up as you leave.          Make lunch ahead and store it in the refrigerator. Look at what makes morning stressful and see what you can do the day before to ease that critical morning time.


12.     Don't treat friends or adult family better than you treat yourself. And don't treat them better than you treat your child.


13.     Pattern breaking #13.  Teach yourself the same lessons we are teaching children in this society about "good touch" and "bad touch."  Learn the difference for you. If you experience a "bad touch" or a "bad feeling" around any kind of touch (from anyone) get yourself out of that situation.


What self-esteem building practices might be just the thing for you now?


*English: The Painter Prince by Paul Ricken


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