---
title: The Dilemma in Recovery
description: Internationally acclaimed recovery site focused on eating disorders, moving from fragility to power, developing confidence at work and in relationships, and narcissistic abuse recovery. Created by Joanna Poppink, MFT
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The dilemma in your recovery process is that eventually, healing and triumph require that you face secrets in yourself.

Despite the benefits in freedom, overeating is difficult to stop. You are using food to stop or prevent yourself from feeling uncomfortable or painful emotions. Your eating patterns are a solution to difficult emotional experience.

  You may be eating for protection from loneliness and self doubt.  You may be hiding from your own anger.  You may feel eating protects you from danger. Often you don't even know this. What you do know is that you feel uncomfortable, nervous, irritable and frightened when you try to stop overeating.

These feelings signal that you have secrets from yourself.

Whether you are underweight, normally weighted or overweight, your eating solution can become a problem. You are tired of the roller coaster ride where you get control of your eating only to return to old patterns. You are weary of feeling like a failure when once again you find yourself alone in front of the television eating junk food. You feel even worse when you are trying to binge on broccoli or sprouts in a futile attempt to reach emotional oblivion without harming yourself. You know this is all wrong, but all your efforts to change seem futile.

Your dilemma is that you can change your eating patterns permanently only if you face and resolve your secrets.

If you follow any reasonable diet regime you will lose or gain weight, depending on your goal.

However, since diets address behavior alone they strip you of your protection from your own secrets. No alternative protection is given. As you eat more appropriately your anxiety can grow until it is unbearable.

With feelings of false power and superiority, or shame, guilt and relief, you return to the food solution.

Addressing the unknown in yourself is the heart of any useful method to stop overeating.

If your overeating is a short term and mild problem, you can address it with this guide and patient friends. If it is a long term or life interfering situation you will need to include additional [forms of help](http://secure30.inmotionhosting.com/%7Eeating6/guide/edcghelp.html).

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