---
title: Exercise 5
description: Internationally acclaimed recovery site focused on eating disorders, moving from fragility to power, developing confidence at work and in relationships, and narcissistic abuse recovery. Created by Joanna Poppink, MFT
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Situation - reaching for a snack: You are reaching for a snack. You want to say "no" to the snack, and you can't.

Exercise: Pause. Pay attention to your breathing.

1\. Think. Where else do you say "yes" because you can't say "no"? Do you smile or silently accept behavior or requests from people despite your discomfort?

2\. Write down an incident that occurs to you where you wish you could have said "no" or "stop."

3\. Write down the snack situation.

4\. Answer these questions regarding the snack:

> What do you think would happen if you said "no"?
> 
> What would you feel?
> 
> What benefits might you get if you said "no"?
> 
> What benefits might you get for saying "yes"?
> 
> What hardships might you get for saying "yes"?

5\. Answer these questions regarding the incident. What do you think would happen if you said "no"? What would you feel? What benefits might you get if you said "no"? What benefits might you get for saying "yes"? What hardships might you get for saying "yes"?

Compare your answers. Do they have anything in common?

You may be saying "yes" to the snack and "yes" to a person or organization to protect yourself from some kind of discomfort. Your unwilling "yes" may be a way of sacrificing joyful opportunities.

Keep what you've written about these situations, questions and answers. Include them in your journal. Compare them to other situations where you say "yes" with words or with body acceptance but would prefer to say "no."

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