---
title: How to Say No to Bulimia and Yes to Recovery
description: secrets and recovery 
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date: 2012-08-14T14:28:02Z
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A woman wrote asking if she could cure herself of bulimia on her own because she doesn't want anyone to know about her bingeing and purging. Then she goes on to say that she's lost 40 pounds. She wants to keep her condition secret yet in one year she developed these symptoms:

> teeth weakening
> 
> legs and arms tingle
> 
> dizzy all the time
> 
> jaw cracks when she opens her mouth to eat or yawn or talk
> 
> She's withdrawn from her friends. She feels uncomfortable with people
> 
> She goes on to say that she doesn't want anyone to know that she is throwing up every day and that she is terrified that her doctor might suspect something when she goes for her regular check up.

 This woman really believes that people in her life will not notice that she has changed drastically in one year and that her health is deteriorating.

She doesn't want to suffer but she can't bring herself to tell anyone she has bulimia, not even her doctor. Can you identify with her story? Do you know someone in this situation?

Here's my response to her. Perhaps it will help you too.

> "Please rally your courage and read this from someone who knows and cares.
> 
> You are caught in your eating disorder so severely that you now suffer not only from physical and emotional symptoms but also from cognitive distortions. In other words, your thinking, that you believe is logical, doesn't make sense.
> 
> To get on your recovery path you will have to go against what your starved brain is telling you.
> 
> It's like reaching into the dark for a friendly hand when you believe a nightmare creature is there. The nightmare creature is just a hologram your starved brain created. The friendly hand that you can't see is real.
> 
> The two things you want least in the world are the two things you need to make happen. You need to eat. You need to confide in people who can help you.
> 
> Your distorted thinking will shout, "No!" The life force in you that led you to ask your question whispers, "Please, yes."
> 
> Which path will you choose?
> 
> I wish you all the strength, courage and desire for health you need to make the wise choice."

  
 I hope you too will make the wise choice that allows you to heal and thrive in health and happiness.

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