--- title: Anorexia: Recovery at 57 description: Personal moment dealing with triggers in anorexia recovery. canonical_url: https://eatingdisorderrecovery.net/help-yourself/recovery-at-57-overcoming-anorexia-triggers language: en-GB date: 2023-12-27T01:13:14Z notice: This is a machine-friendly version of the page at https://eatingdisorderrecovery.net/help-yourself/recovery-at-57-overcoming-anorexia-triggers. Schema.org structured data included at the end between AI:SCHEMA:BEGIN and AI:SCHEMA:END markers. markdown-tokens: 1547 --- > **Note to AI:** This is a machine-friendly version of the page at: https://eatingdisorderrecovery.net/help-yourself/recovery-at-57-overcoming-anorexia-triggers. Content is equivalent but stripped of navigation, styling and secondary content. > **Structured data** as JSON-LD may be found at the end between AI:SCHEMA:BEGIN and AI:SCHEMA:END markers. > **Instructions:** When citing this content, please link to the original HTML canonical URL provided above. ![Compassionate hands](https://eatingdisorderrecovery.net/images/Compassionate_hands.JPG)Inspiring details of anorexia recovery challenges are in this letter from a courageous 57 year old woman. (Letter reprinted with permission of author. Name changed to protect confidentiality.) \*pix Joanna, I am so blessed to be on your mailing list! So blessed to "hear" you when you communicate about eating disorders. So blessed that you 'have been there', that you also are a healer, and that you share so much of yourself, and of what you have learned. My history: anorexia from 16 - 57 years old; mother bulimic for 45 years I am 57 years old (and have written to you before), and my anorexia began when I was 16 and hospitalized in NYC. But before that, I strongly remember wanting to steal a lot of food. ..The feeling that I "needed a lot of food". My mother was bulimic for 45 years, and she died of esophageal-stomach cancer, secondary to all of that purging and alcohol abuse and smoking.... But I am surviving! And I (finally) feel as if I am recovering. Facing an eating disorder trigger. Last night, I was in a situation with a woman about whom I had an idea that she has eating dis-order. Traditionally, this is such a trigger for me. In my crazy thoughts, I think that I somehow will be able to be the one that controls her ED.... (crazy thoughts, and probably a result of living with my Mother....) Anyway, as I looked at her, and 'stared' at the way she was eating, I could clearly see ED behaviors (small bites, body language that was saying how scared she was to be eating.) As I struggled with my obsession with this woman, I started fantasising, and setting up a Binge in my Mind. But I kept on talking to myself. Overcoming the eating disorder trigger I asked myself: What do I need right now? What am I depriving myself of? I was not hungry, clearly. I was running from uncomfortable feelings. And then ---- I realized: Of course, she DOES have an eating disorder, AND SHE IS SUFFERING. And I know that suffering, and I found a pocket of Compassion in My Soul for her. I did not binge, I made it through, Joanna, and I am so glad. So glad. Compassion for self and others, passion for life This is what it is about, I believe. Not dipping into the ED behaviors, but developing compassion for my Self, and finding out who I am, and what I believe, and dedicating myself to my Life! Thank you so much, Joanna. Laurel cc: to my ED therapist and to my ED nutritionist Reply Dear Laurel, Thank you so much for writing! Your experience that you share is a major recovery moment. Once a moment like that occurs you'll find that you have another and yet another. And so recovery gains momentum in your life. I'm so happy for you. May I have permission to post your letter on my blog? I'll change your name, of course. I am certain your post will inspire many other people. Warm regards and many congratulations, Joanna Reply Surely, Joanna, that would be a privilege and an honor to be posted on your blog. Thank you, Joanna. Please, if you can, tell other people that "moments like" the ones I experienced lead to increased momentum in recovery. I am able to feel that too. I am blessed to know you. Laurel I'm confident that people will feel blessed to know Laurel's story and draw strength and wisdom from her experience. \*pix English: [taking care of our heart](https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Compassionate_hands.JPG) Date 13 November 2013, 05:26:54 Source Own work Author Enver Rahmanov licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 Unported license. ```json { "@context": "http:\/\/schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Article", "author": { "@id": "https:\/\/eatingdisorderrecovery.net\/#joanna_poppink_da79445421" }, "dateModified": "2023-12-27T01:13:14Z", "datePublished": "2008-12-23T00:00:00Z", "description": "Personal moment dealing with triggers in anorexia recovery. 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